Studentie, dulce melodie :)

Imi amintesc de multe ori de experientsa numita ASEM. Eram mici, fara de griji, pierdeam foarte mult timp fara a ne da seama ca il pierdem, caci aveam destul. Stateam de vorba in parc, mincam piine cu chefir sau chifle cu magiun, consumam alcool in public caci nu aveam destule mijloace financiare pentru a merge de fiecare data la Andy's. Mergeam la ore insa rareori eram atenti - tin minte cum in anul 1 stateam in banca 2, asa cum ii sta bine unei shefe de grupa - nici chiar in prima banca unde stau persoanele ce se concentreaza doar la invatat, si nici prea departe, unde sunt cei ce se concentreaza doar la alte aspecte. In anii ce au urmat insa, am ajuns sa stau in ultimele banci - caci ori intirziam si dadeam vina pe cozile intermitente de la decanat, ori ma decideam in ultimul moment sa particip la ora data. Ah, momente fericite. :)

In strainatate insa lucrurile stau nitel altfel. Prezenta nu este obligatorie - decit la orele de limba straina - si totusi, exista persoane ce vin la ore insa nu asculta. M-am intrebat, de ce nu stati acasa, dragi copii, mai ales ca majoritatea vin cu calculatoare si stau pe facebook. De exemplu, cind eram la ASEM, frecventam orele si pentru ca era un mijloc bun de comunicare si un bun mod de a cunoaste alte persoane. Aici insa, oamenii vin si stau in fata la calculator. Nu poti face acelasi lucru si acasa? Nu, caci 1. Daca pierd o lectie vor intra in dependentsa de a nu veni la nici una. Da, poate... si 2. le pare ca anume lectia la care nu vor merge va fi acea lectie cind profesorul va spune ceva despre examen. Pai... uita-te la "Past Exams", la examenele din anii trecuti si stii deja ce format va avea examenul, cite intrebari sunt, ce fel de intrebari si ce se cere de la tine din punct de vedere intelectual. La asem lucrurile stau foaaarte diferit - caci majoritatea examenelor, fiind in orale, cunoasterea persoanei tale de catre profesor este un element crucial. Caci atunci cind profesorul crede ca esti "fata /baiat bun" care a fost prezent si mai mult sau mai putin atent la ore, atunci el poate sa mai inchida ochii la anumite greseli pe care le faci in examen si deci ia in consideratie performatele tale de pe parcursul intregului an. Da, acest lucru permite un anumit nivel de discriminare in defavoarea celor ce sunt nevoiti sa lucreze in timpul studiilor si deci nu au acelasi nivel de familiaritate cu profesorul, insa in general, acest sistem este unul bun, date fiind conditiile din moldova, mai ales dat fiind gradul inalt de iresponsabilitate si incultura caracteristic multor studenti. Iar in cazul examenelor scrise, surprizele curg shiroi, caci exemplul anilor trecuti este ori inaccesibil, ori inutil, caci formatul examenelor se schimba de 3 ori pe an.
Si ok, daca ai note mici, acest lucru nu inseamna ca nu vei gasi un job la fel de "bine" platit ca un student cu note mari. Daca nu dai examenele, nu pierzi nimic decit maximum o bursa de 200 lei ( in cazul limitat al putinilor bursieri) si deci... de ce sa pierzi timpul la ore cind poti sa il folosesti intr-un mod muuult mai util? Eu mergeam la ore... Si ma bucur, caci am primit si cunostinte in materie si cunostinte de viata.

In strainatate insa, consecintele unor note mici sunt mult mai grave. Pierzi bursa si deci trebuie sa platesti taxele scolare si intretinerea. Nu dai examenele, cobori in rating pe liste si deci nu poti beneficia de toate oportunitatile prezente ( in MD nu ai shansa sa pleci un semestru peste hotare cu bursa, nu poti sa te angajezi la practica "platita" cu shasa ulterioara de angajare, nu ai shansa de a participa la multe conferinte nationale si internationale pe tematici globale etc) Deci, aici, trebuie sa inveti. Si majoritatea studentilor o fac... in sesiune.
Inte timp insa, fraze de genu " Dau examenul si scap de obiectul asta oribil" umplu coridoarele universitatilor. La Asem auzi acelasi lucru, insa la ASEM nu prea ai shansa sa iti alegi cursurile, pe cind in strainatate, da. Si deci, cum poti sa zici ca "scapi in sfirsit" de Contabilitate cind aceasta iti este specializarea? Cum poti sa zici ca Marketing-ul nu este pentru tine, cind esti la facultatea MARKETING? Eu cred ca la ASEM studentii sunt mai indreptatiti sa zica ca un anume curs nu este pe placul lor pentru ca la asem se studiaza de toate cite putin. Sunt multe cursuri, si deci, din MUUULTE iti alegi citeva care iti plac. In strainatate insa, ai putine cursuri, toate la tema, toate in rind cu specialitatea aleasa, si totusi, studentii vor sa "scape".
Poate asa gindesc acum, cind sunt mai matura. Poate de as avea si eu 18-19 ani ( m-ash intoarce cu mare placere la acea virsta ) as proceda la fel ca si stundetii mamosi si alintati de aici. Nu sunt toti asa, insa crema studentimii apartine altui post :)

Back to "normal"

As i see it, the adversity to change is a purely economical term used in management practices in order to describe the willingness of employees to adopt new strategies, their ability to adapt to new circumstances and their performance in unfamiliar situations.
In more simple terms, change makes people think, and we hate that. When one gets used to a certain procedure, to a certain way, he no longer wishes to move away from that certain warm spot where everything is clear and nice. Of course, this does not apply to all, but in general, i think that humans are not set to enjoy changes too much, as it creates risk, it brings out the unknown and the uncertain. There are numerous talks on the subjects and even more articles on the net, so i will not get into any of those.
To resume : Out of the famous statement " Are we good at what we like or do we like what we are good at? " i am at the moment inclined to believe more and more that we are extremely addicted to our own comfort and we hate change because it makes it harder to deal with previously known situations that now become difficult all of a sudden. Change of job, change of house, change of city, change of my online dictionary page layout that makes me extremely angry and, of course, the change of Facebook - all just examples...
I would say that given Facebook's estimated value of somewhere around 9.5 billion dollars ( my source is Unimedia, my internet is waaaaay too slow to look for other sources, sorry), dealing with adversity to change through this example is very representative : the most obvious proof are the "Change Facebook back to normal" groups on the site. These types of groups appear every time the social networking site changes its appearance, some of its functions or other aspects. And the users are not against the changes because the new version is worse, they are simply against CHANGE in general. The site suffers updates quite often, and the new version is ALWAYS worse than the old one... the OLD one being a version that was NEW at some point in time too, a version that had created its own "Change facebook back to how it was" groups. And yes, there are plenty of users to join the groups, the latter having as much as 1,772,241 members up to date. Names range from normal requests like "We Hate The New Facebook, So STOP CHANGING IT" to stuff like "Facebook will never change anything to the way we want it". No, because it is the CHANGE element that we hate, not the changes that are made. "Is it me or did facebook change again?" - Is it me or is change progress? And if you do sit in front of the computer all day, the least they can do to make you think is to change the locations of the buttons that you are now clicking automatically. And of course, you hate it. "Change facebook once more and we are going!!!!" - No you won't, you are addicted.
Further, i encountered comments like

"Pepple it is so important that facebook is changed back to normal, CHANGE IT BACK TO THE WAY IT WAS!!!" and

"My dad wz yelling at me cuz he didnt know about the whole news live feed thing and he thought i "befriended" him. CRAZY!!!!!!!!!" - Parents on facebook.. the new trend :) My sister said that in 2035 our children will make fun of us "is your mum still on Facebook? hahaha, that's sooooo last century!"

"I hate the new facebook. The old one I figured out and I don't have time to try and figure this one out... Please change it back."

"I'm sorry, it has been two weeks, i can't see my posts, i am confused and i hate this change in Facebook!!!!!Please change it back Please"
"the new facebook is gay."

"Now Facebook shows information that nobody really cares about. I want the old one back!!!!!!"

Funny, sad, true. I abstain from further comments, as i will set them down in another post. I use Facebook too. Not as much as others, but still a lot. And yes, i dislike the changes too, but i don't go creating groups like "Change my Google Logo to the one they had last year."

I am from Moldova

Today, while having a friend over and discussing countries and people, a blog address surfaced. I have read it almost entirely and i was silently or loudly laughing at the things that an American thinks of Moldova. He is a Peace Corps Volunteer and his assignment is Community and Organizational Development. At the moment, as i understood, he lives in a village, although i am not sure which. I am glad that there are people that get involved into such programs and i am sure that they can make a difference, even a small one, on every person that comes their way. It is true, as Chris has mentioned it, that for most people, he is the first American they meet, so his presence alone makes them aware of the fact that the rest of the world is not as far as they have immagined it to be. Having closed borders for so long and being under the soviet rule, people from Moldova remain closed-minded even today, some are extremely conservative, these mostly being features of the elderly. Things are changing now, but it will still be a while till we reach the levels of the developped communities. Some technology seems too far, too expensive, too useless and too complicated. But little by little, with combined efforts, due to the increased possibilities of studies abroad and due to better environments in fields like education, health care, research and media, i think that Molova will be able to make up for the time it has lost all the while keeping its values intact and cherishing its traditions the way it does now.

I am proud to be from Moldova and i know that to many people, we are a strange phenomenon. For example my room-mates comment on my food habits - on eating potatoes, meat-balls ( cotlete), fried eggs ( ochiuri) and for drinking lots and lots of tea. They do not want to try my salads (olivie, salata de crabi, salata de varza) and they do not share the same impulse to save energy, water and gas. It is true, we have been brought up in different ways, and yes, they have had more opportunities than i had, but i still feel that i have accomplished a lot by being where i am and who i am. I was a product of the education that the western condemn, i was the result of the rough education in school when teachers get to call you names and punish you for being bad. I was the one that tried to get myself heard just because nobody listened. Yes, we have harsh conditions, especially in villages, but we have developped a sense of endurance and a sense of greatfullness for whatever life brings us. We do not complain at the first hit of fait, we do not blame anyone but us when we err, and we do not expect any help from anybody, because experience tells us that waiting in is in vain. We are friendly and open, we are sincere and we have strong family values, we have good friends to love and cherish. We like to think of ourselves as rich in our souls, because even in our poverty, we make things look nice and bright.

I am from Moldova and i am not ashamed to say it.

Pe-un picior de plai, pe-o gura de rai.....

Cu totii am stat cu ochii atsintitsi asupra antenei 3, post de televiziune roman unde se difuzau imagini live din Chisinau si unde se faceau comentarii veridice asupra celor intimplate. Cu totii am deskis rind pe rind acele link-uri pe care tot noi le punem in status-uri pe Facebook. Cu totsii ne-am indignat cind unimedia.md a cedat, si apoi tot noi am descoperit unimedia.info. Cu totii am suferit pentru fiecare piatra aruncata in cladirea presedintsiei, o cladire a carei unic pacat a fost sa ii ofere ospitalitate presedintelui ales in 2005 tot prin fraudarea voturilor. Cu totii am devenit palizi la fatsa cind am vazut ploaia de documente oficiale, cu totsii ne-am intrebat cum au ajuns atit de repede baietsii aia pe parlament, cu totii am vrut sa stim cine totusi a aruncat prima piatra si, cel mai important, de unde a luat-o.... Am stat si eu si am implorat politsia sa nu lase oamenii sa fure tot ce gasesc in cladire, am strigat si eu la pompieri sa stinga focul din cladirea frumoasa a parlamentului.
Imi era rusine si teama sa ma uit la cele intimplate. Ma temeam pentru prietenii si familia mea, ma durea pentru tsara mea. Caci cit de saraca nu ar fi, cit de cenzurata si de asuprita, ramine a fi tsara mea pe care o admir anume prin oamenii ei. Si cind zik de oameni, nu am in vedere acele persoane inculte si agramate care nu pot lega 2 cuvinte. Nu vorbesc de acei oameni ce nu au valori si se vind la cu 1 leu kilogramul. Cind zic "oameni", vorbesc despre acele persoane ce duc mai departe in lume faima tsarii. Caci noi, cu resurse limitate am ajuns sa ocupam posturi inalte in companii prestigioase. Noi, comunisti fiind, mereu sub cenzura si cu libertati minime, am reusit sa fim cunoscuti in lumea intreaga. Noi, invatati de acei profesori care au salarii mizere, noi, cei care nu avem acces la informatsiile de care au parte persoanele din altre tsari. Noua ne e frica sa vorbim, si deci ascultam. Invatam. Da, tsara nu ne poate oferi un loc de munca decent si un trai indestulat. Mintsi stralucite pleaca pentru a servi altor natiuni. Ma bucura insa faptul ca nu se uita de tsara. Ma bucur ca nu uitam de drapel si nu uitam de unde venim. Glumim noi ca Moldova ne este oficiu central, pe cind suntem peste tot in lume. Este realitatea cruda, insa Moldova ne este casa. Caci in Moldova ne sunt ingropati stramosii. In Moldova a luptat Stefan cel Mare. In Moldova am crescut, datorita Moldovei suntem cine suntem.
Eram peste tot si niciunde in acelasi timp. Insa odata cu aceste revolte am ajuns in vizorul presei internationale, deci in sfirsit adevarul a iesit la iveala. Pina si Romania, o tsara atit de apropitata de noi din punct de vedere cultural si lingvistic era dezinformata cu privire la atmosfera in Moldova. Romanul de rind era convins ca noi suntem o natiune de comunisti - caci prin inactiunea noastra demonstram indiferentsa, prin tacerea de care dadeam dovada ne acceptam soarta de fiecare data cind presedintele nostru "ales prin metode democratice" dadea cu bita-n balta si anuntsa "implicarea romaniei in chestiunile interne ale Moldovei". Acum insa se stie pentru ce luptam. Acum se stie ce valori avem. Acum suntem in sfirsit ascultati. E prea tirziu sa ne oprim, acum nici nu o putem face. Caci da, avem o obligatsie morala fatsa de copii nostri pe care nu vrem sa ii vedem fara parintsi si rude, asa cum am crescut noi. Este o obligatsie pentru fratsii nostri, care poate nu vor mai fi nevoiti sa plece peste hotare pentru a studia, ci care o vor face din dorintsa. Trebuie sa o facem pentru parintsii nostri care au luptat o viatsa intreaga ca sa ne ofere un trai decent. Trebuie sa o facem pentru noi. Pentru ca da, noi suntem cei ce ne scriem istoria. Aceeasi istorie a carei victime am fost. Noi, aceasta bucatsica de pamint, acel colts de rai, noi am fost mereu un fel de mar al discordiei, iar toate cuceririle si dezmembrarile nu au putut insa sa ne dezbine familiile si sa ne ucida valorile. Prin deportari si prin alte bariere se incerca uciderea in masa a intelectului moldovean. Un exemplu este inventarea unei noi limbi, sau fortsarea studiilor in limba rusa. Se planifica o scadere in randamentul studentsilor moldoveni din cauza necunoasterii limbii la nivel inalt. Surpriza insa, acele timpuri, cu toate greutatsile sale, au dat nastere unor mintsi luminate si a unor intelecte ce stralucesc si acum in stiintsa si in arte. Da, suntem puternici. Da, avem valori. Da, avem principii. Iarasi, nu vorbesc de acele lepadaturi ce ishi construiesc viitor in alcool, in violentsa si in prostie. Acestia au fost, sunt si vor fi. Eu vorbesc de mine, de tine, de familiile si de prietenii nostri.
De aceea sper. Nu am incredere in ajutorul de peste hotare, caci nu prezentam interes suficient pentru nimeni. Pentru un petic mic de pamint nu va risca nimeni un conflict cu Rusia cea datatoare de gaz. Am incredere doar in noi. In cei ce ies in centru si scandeaza pentru liberate. In cei ce faciliteaza diseminarea informatsiilor. Am incredere in cei ce organizeaza miscari de solidaritate in toate capitalele lumii. Am incredere si cred.

Yet another post about 2012 on the www

Am auzit de curind de la o prietena ca anul 2012 ar fi sfirsitul lumii, cum ca o planeta X se va ciocni cu pamintul si asa mai departe. Apoi astazi am deskis in sfirsit un document primit cu mai multe zile in urma tot prin intermediul www - a acelei mashinarii care este salvarea noastra insa care se spune ca ne va fi si calau. In acele 9 pagini se descriu evenimentele ce au loc acum in lume: criza financiara, petrol, politica etc. Se vorbeste si despre "Obama deception", acel film ce teoretic arata lumii intregi care este adevarul. Auzisem de acest film mai inainte, si chiar am privit prima parte pe Youtube, si mi-a fost destul pentru a intelege ca este un alt film ce se vrea in top din cauza "adevarurilor" spuse. Ceea ce ma intereseaza pe mine insa, daca totusi e adevarat ca Obama este un pion si ca "Marile Elite" creeaza acum trecerea catre un nou "Sistem Mondial" in care populatsia va fi supusa unei mari puteri unice - atunci de ce aceasta PUTERE a permis difuzarea acestui adevar?
Da, m-a pus pe ginduri faptul ca pe zi ce trece devenim tot mai dependentsi de un sistem pe care il intelegem tot mai putin, ca pe zi ce trece pierdem din independentsa si pe zi ce trece gindim mai putsin pentru ca nu mai este nevoie sa o facem... Da, ma ingrijoreaza faptul ca in zilele noastre orice om este ( sau poate fi) urmarit si controlat prin intermediul telefonului mobil, al cartsilor de credit, a documentelor sale etc. Da, ma gindesc si la problemele incalzirii globale si da, simt si eu ca lumea nu merge intr-o directie dubioasa. E drept ca azi am revazut primele 20 min din Matrix, insa gindurile mele nu au absolut nici o legatura cu fictiunea expusa in acel film. Si apropo de filme, 2012 are deja site-ul sau. Am vazut trailer-ul, si da, am ris ca producatorii/ marketologii au utilizat la final in loc de banalul "coming soon" - "coming too soon". M-am amuzat si m-am convins inca o data ca totul este un subiect numai bun de mediatizat. Pentru ca da, intrasem deja intr-o criza mai acuta decit cea financiara, si anume criza mediatica. Lumea este deja destul de deschisa pentru a primi orice idee cit de inovatoare si cit de ireala nu ar fi, deci este foarte complicat deja sa faci fictiune cu succes.... din simplul motiv ca multe teme au fost deja epuizate. Mai ales temele cu sfirsitul lumii sau cele ce prezinta un viitor "diferit". Si da, ceea ce era fictiune citva timp in urma se apropie tot mai mult de realizare - imi amintesc foarte bine cu cit drag urmaream "The jetsons" la Cartoon Network doar pentru ca aveau tot felul de mashinarii pentru a-shi satisface tot felul de capricii. Si da, tsin minte foarte bine cit de impresionata eram de bandele rulante, de video-telefoane si de mashini zburatoare. Se mai mira insa cineva de ele in zilele noastre? Nu. Pentru ca suntem la un pas de a le avea.
Da, avem tehnologii. Intrebarile mele insa ramin. Ca de exemplu, ma intreb cu inversunare cum putem sa sustinem ca tehnologiile noastre sunt mai avansate daca nu am putut replica piramidele egiptene? Ma intreb daca civilizatiile anterioare au stiut ceva ce noi nu stim, caci de multe ori observatiile noastre, facute folosind tehnica de ultima ora, genereaza aceleashi concluzii ca si cele scrise in piatra cu mii de ani in urma. Ma intreb CUM ?
Da, ma intreb de ce au disparut dinozaurii.
Exista foarte multe lucruri pe lumea asta pe care noi, fiecare individ in parte, nu suntem capabili sa le intelegem. Incepind cu fizica si chimia, cu astronomia si geografia, cu biologia si psihologia. Da, noi utilizam doar un mic procent din capacitatea creierului nostru. Si nu intelegem. De aia ne punem intrebari. Eu, de exemplu, cind eram mica, mereu intrebam unde se afla pamintul. Parintsii imi ziceau ca se afla in univers, iar universul este mare mare, infinit. "Si unde se termina?" Intrebam eu. " Nu se termina niciodata!" Nu, nu pot intelege conceptul de infinit. Caci noi traim intr-o lume unde totul are inceput si sfirsit. La fel nu putem concepe planuri quatrodimensionale. Pentru ca noi invatam prin experientsa. Prin observatii.

Vine oare sfirsitul lumii?

Am citit " No Doomsday in 2012" . Am citit si comentariile. E drept ca nu pe toate 2400+. Articolul a fost scris pe 18 mai 2008. Adica un an in urma. Eu am ajuns abia acum la el. Am stiut de pericolul coliziunii unei planete cu pamintul, stiam ca cica trebuie sa se intimple cam pe acuma. Nu stiam insa de calendarul Maya, nu stiam pentru ca nu mi-a parut relevanta aceasta informatie. Interesanta? Da. Relevanta? Nu. Sugerez insa celor interesati sa citeasca articolul. Merita.


Gata. E drept ca nu vreau sa fiu controlata, nu vreau sa imi introduca nimeni nici un chip nicaieri, nu vreau ca populatia Terrei sa fie redusa la 500,000,000 oameni prin intermediul bombelor nuclare. Vreau sa traiesc, eu si copiii copiilor mei.

Nu cred in sfirsitul lumii, in cel mai strict sens al cuvintului. Insa cred in sfirsitul lumii asa cum o stim noi acum. Caci fiecare din noi este martor la acest fenomen - deja buneii nostri nu mai recunosc lumea in care traiesc. Deja noi uneori suntem depasiti de valul de tehnologizare, globalizare si progres.

"“What a caterpillar calls the end of the World, the master calls a butterfly.”
("Sfirsitul lumii pentru o omida este un fluture").

Internet, Mere si Dragoste

Ieri, cind au aparut rezultatele pentru programul de schimb si deci studentsii din Bocconi au aflat in ce tsara vor petrece semestrul urmator, site-ul universitatii a cedat din cauza prea multor utilizatori. Nici o frica insa, exista acea alternativa numita facebook, unde prin status-uri si prin mesaje toata lumea deja stie unde si cine pleaca. Deja Hong Kong, Singapore, Manchester sau Dublin par aproape. Caci da, asa cum scrie in cartea pe care o citesc in timp ce ar trebui sa invat pentru examene, lumea nu mai este rotunda. Este plata. Diferentsele incep a disparea, incetul cu incetul, ne internationalizam si ne standardizam cu totii. De exemplu, ieri am descoperit ca in "mesaje prestabilite" din telefonul mobil exista si acel template " Si eu te iubesc" pentru a nu forta persoana sa scrie de zeci de mii de ori aceeasi fraza ( da poate el/ ea vrea sa o scrie, sa o simta???)Si uite asa, ne miscam spre o lume in care viata accelereaza iar un pic de neatentsie te arunca si te lasa prafuit pe margine. Da, cu totii facem greseli - si parintsii, si bunicii si strabunicii nostri le-au facut. Noi nu stim cum a fost sa traiesti in acele timpuri. Poate am auzit multe povesti si istorioare despre razboi si despre ciuma, despre foamete si saracie, despre frica si despre tiranie. Le privim insa ca pe niste fabule, astazi traiul fiind atit de diferit... Cindva toate pozele se faceau in grup, in zile speciale, toata lumea se imbraca frumos si statea serioasa pentru a nu risca sa strice fotografia. Acum se fac mii si mii de poze, cu ocazie sau fara. Cindva, dainuia frica generala ce te facea sa nu vorbesti despre anumite teme nici macar in propria ta casa, pentru ca da, si peretii aveau urechi. Acuma ne sustinem ideile sus si tare, fie ele corecte sau nu. Cindva, casatoriile erau aranjate de catre parinti, iar fetele ce aveau virsta maritatului (18 ani!) rareori protestau pentru ca fiind intr-o lume inchisa, acceptau ca sots acel barbat care le cerea mina. Nu cunosteau alti baieti si deci invatau sa iubeasca si sa fie sotii bune pentru acel unic barbat, al lor. Acum insa, alegerea este atit de mare, incit se creeaza acele standarde si acele cerintse pe care o persoana le are fatsa de partenerul sau. Ieri mi s-a spus ca noi, femeile, fiind urmashe ale Evei, suntem cele ce sadim samintsa curiozitatii nesanatoase - consumul fructului interzis, a inshelaciunii - oferim acel fruct barbatului inocent de linga noi, a minciunilor - mintsim in legatura cu incalcarea unei promisiuni si a lipsei de caintsa - ne ascundem, rushinate,si dam vina pe firea umana. Discutiile de ieri si alaltaieri pe care le-am purtat cu reprezentatsii sexului puternic m-au facut sa ma intreb, chiar credeti, voi, barbatii, ca noi suntem vinovatele? Eu as zice ca Adam nu a stiut cum sa o multumeasca pe Eva si deci ea a fost nevoita sa muste din acel mar ;)
M-am abatut nitel de la tema caci voiam sa expun aici gindurile in legatura cu o fraza de care m-am impiedicat ieri, si anume " daca pe fata o maninca undeva, baiatu nu are deja ce sa faca". Poate sa o scarpine ( scuzati-mi limbajul), in primul rind.
Vorbeam despre acele relatii in care la un moment dat, dispare acel foc, acel ceva, acel "vino-ncoace" care se transforma in "stai acolo". In aceste cazuri, persoanele dinauntrul relatiei incep a cauta alte forme de divertisment. Intrebarea mea, pe care am dat-o baietilor, a fost daca ei ar merge la o "serie de intrevederi" bazata pe elemente fizice si pe reactsii chimice, daca ar trece cu ochii peste faptul ca fata respectiva are prieten si deci prin a actiona conform unei atractii, el, baiatul din exterior, ar interveni intr-o relatie. Raspunsurile au fost diverse, insa in linii mari, toate au fost afirmative. Cel mai reprezentativ argument a fost ca "Daca nu cu mine, atunci ea se va duce la altul, insa oricum o va face." Asa si este. Cind un partener (fata sau baiat, ca sa nu discriminam) nu mai este satisfacut de anumite elemente ale relatiei, dupa ce va epuiza toate alternativele de acasa, va pleca in ospetie.
Am inceput aceste discutii cu persoanele din jur pentru ca de mai multe zile imi da tircoale o intrebare, care mi-a fost pusa, si anume, daca m-ash baga eu intr-o relatie. Eu am zis initial ca nu, pentru ca este raspunsul corect la aceasta intrebare. Am motivat ca am principiul " ce tie nu-ti place, altuia nu face." Din pacate insa, in viata nu este totul atit de simplu, iar eu, hoinarind printre amintirile mele, am descoperit si acea seara cind am fost in asa situatie. Si da, m-am lasat dusa de val. M-am scarpinat :) Nu sunt mindra de mine, insa nici nu regret acel moment, caci niciodata nu am regretat ceva ce la un moment dat in timp m-a facut atit de fericita....
Concluzie: Viata e scurta, dragostea frumoasa, visele realizabile iar viitorul incert :)

Adevar sau provocare? Instinct sau Ego?

Zi de zi, ora de ora, in orice minut si chiar secunda, in lume se intimpla atitea lucruri. Si de cele mai multe ori, aceste evenimente sunt mai interesante decit ceea ce tsi se intimpla tsie in aceeashi secunda.
In acest moment, de exemplu, in camera de alaturi sta Giuseppe, cu un muschi la spate intins si cu intrebari primordiale despre instinctul natural al barbatului de a domina si cel al femeilor de a fi posedate. M-a invitat si pe mine in dezbateri si da, pina la urma, el a auzit ceea ce a vrut sa auda, chiar daca eu am concretizat ca in aceasta lume totul este relativ si ca viatsa totusi nu este o formula matematica chiar daca in momente de influientse exterioare negative am afirmat ca da, viatsa este un shir de variabile ordonate dupa un algoritm bine pus la punct. Ajunsesem sa zik chiar ca si dragostea este o ecuatsie si deci poate fi demonstrata prin tehnici matematice simple - ma bucur insa ca aceste pareri ale mele au fost imediat respinse si trimise catre regindire :) Totusi, problema expusa de Gius m-a facut sa imi expim a n-a oara parerea ca da, instinctul natural al femeii este de a se lasa dominata. Ca da, iubim acea putere de care dau dovada barbatsii, acel curaj cu care trec prin viatsa, acea hotarire cu care merg inainte, acea claritate cu care rezolva problemele si acea fortsa cuc are ne ocrotesc pe noi, femeile, firi sensibile si emotive. Desigur, un barbat trebuie sa fie si sensibil, intelegator si iubitor, la fel cum o femeie nu poate fi doar alintata in ochii unui barbat chiar daca de multe ori le hranim egoul prin a-i lasa sa ne mingiie sufletselele. Nu, o femeie trebuie sa fie si ea puternica, desteapta, hotarita si provocatoare. Deci da, chiar daca instinctul este de a te lasa sub dominatsia unui barbat, lumea evouleaza astfel incit rolurile nu mai sunt atit de bine definite. O femeie poate purta pantalonii in casa la fel de bine ca si un barbat. Vrea ea insa sa fie stapin in casa? Sau vrea ca barbatul sa loveasca cu pumnul in masa si sa mentsina ordinea? Depinde. Totusi mijlocul e de aur. Cred ca societatea a evoluat destul incit sa nu mai fie aplicabile modelele prestabilite. Cred ca fiecare relatsie, fiecare om si fiecare casa isi are specificul sau. Cum se spune in batrini, fiecare bordei cu al sau obicei.
GIuseppe insa nu a vrut sa se adinceasca in probleme sociale, de egalitate, democratsie sau psihologie. Mai mult il interesa aspectul cel mai de baza, fenomenul de dominant si dominat. Si da, am zis eu. Majoritatea femeilor prefera sa fie dominate in pat.

Scriu

Aveam cindva in partea dreapta a blogului( sau in cea stinga, depinde de ce template foloseam la moment) o lista a acelor bloguri pe care le vizitam frecvent... o faceam nu neaparat cu intentsia de a afla ceva nou - pentru asta exista atitea pagini de shtiri. Eu voiam insa sa vad lumea asa cum e ea, in toata simplitatea si frumusetsea ei, voiam sa o vad si cu ochii altcuiva pentru a o vedea mai bine cu ochii mei. Acum insa nu mai urmaresc nici o scriere aleasa a nici-unui blogger in afara de prietenii mei - caci prea complicata este viziunea unui om cu suflet de artist.Eu, care ma consideram o persoana destul de ingenioasa si creativa, descopar ca sunt... obisnuita. Si nu ma sperie deloc acest gind, ci din contra, ma bucura enorm. Caci da, in aceasta lume exista atit de putsini oameni simpli ce se pierd in marea de persoane "originale", sa le zicem asa pentru a nu folosi cuvintul "ciudat". Acum nu este normal sa fii normal, cum se spunea intr-un film documentar pe care l-am vazut recent, "toti oamenii au innebunit in afara de unul... si el a fost numit nebun. Iar el, pina la urma, a innebunit si el, iar restul au zis ca i-au venit mintsile la cap." Eu ma bucur ca sunt unica in felul meu insa in acelasi timp sunt ca totsi ceilaltsi. Exact asa cum spune profilul meu pe acest blog. Sunt unica, exact ca si ceilaltsi.

Citind articolulul unui prieten de-al meu am dat peste exact aceleasi ginduri pe care le-am avut recent in timp ce tot scriam pe acest blog insa in loc de "publish" selectam optiunea "save as a draft". Mult prea multe idei sunt mult prea personale pentru a fi expuse aici. Mult prea multe evenimente sunt prea banale pentru a le oferi spatsiu pe mult controversatul world wide web. Mult prea multe mesaje merita sa fie transmise direct, fatsa in fatsa, si nu prin intermediul unei pagini de blog. Mult prea multe ore lipsesc din zi, mult prea multe ocupatsii avem, si da, mult prea incet ne dam seama care sunt prioritatsile noastre. Iar incetul cu incetul ne dam seama ca da, exista o lume atit de frumoasa cind esti offline....

P.S. Jenel, prinde la curaj si publica in "Unpublished". Caci orice gind merita sa fie auzit.
Eu, in ultimele zile am scris un post despre dragoste... mi-a parut insa prea banal pentru a-l impartsi cu cineva... apoi am descris o mica aventura pe care nu am mai relatat-o pentru ca o spusesem deja de atitea ori. In alte ocazii am avut diverse idei despre semnificatsia conceptului de "Acasa" si despre legatura dintre planificare/spontaneitate si procrastinare/lene. Le voi publica. Insa in alta zi. :)))

I think, therefore i am

I have finally gotten to this point where i cannot procrastinate no more, when i have to stop denying what is in front of me and accept that there's need for a change. Coz things cannot go on like this. They have been like this long enough, and now it is time. It is time to take the name of my blog seriously, as i have not set it randomly. From the dreamy ME i used to be ("Lacul oglindeste stelele pentru ca vrea sa fie cer"), i went over to "daring to be different", but that did not work too well for me either. Yes, i am different, yes, i am unique.... just like everybody else. But we live in a society where one has to find an equilibrium between being himself and fitting in. So i decided that i was gonna try and do both for a while. Be myself, be different together with other people. I decided to Wake Up and Smell the Coffee, i decided to face the things that i was so afraid to acknowledge up till now.

The above expression was made famous by a newspaper columnist Ann Landers. She used to write about controversial issues like prostitution and how people put razor blades and poison in trick-or-treat candies on Halloween. Homosexuality and other concepts that were unthinkable in the 50s. Among the quotes we find ideas like "Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful." Truth hurts sometimes. But when one is tired of listening to lies, it is time to wake up. And yes, smell the Coffee.

These last 2 days i found myself among the Italians that populate the hot kitchen in the middle of the afternoon trying to cook their pasta. Also, i found myself passively smoking with them late into the night, trying to make something out of their sometimes impossible pronunciation. Opinions that it was sooo strange to see me there were vociferated not only once, but the fact that i did not always hang around them in the past does not mean i didn't want to. It just meant that i usually had other things to do. Which is actually the same thing. But now i decided to make time, to set my priorities and do things differently. It was kinda funny how we were all walking purposelessly on the hallways half a night yesterday, how we were trying to pick on one another, how we were peaking into other people's lives, how we were trying an experiment which involved the 5 of us staring at a piece of un-popped popcorn seed while nothing but "World hold on" playing on Mirko's phone happened. Although the videos on Utube show that a popcorn can pop



we were more like these guys here



As there is a whole controversy on the internet and world wide about whether it is true that the cell phones emit such strong waves, punto-informatico.it says that it is all a fake, that if the cell phones where anywhere close in function to a microwave, every phone call would be extremely painful. But the fact is that the cell phones do heat up the human tissue, but the studies show that it is not dangerous for health. Ok, do we feel safe now that we have seen with our own eyes that the popcorn did not pop?

Waking up yesterday also meant reading something other than the items included in the syllabus of the University or blogs. So i opened a book...Wake up and smell the coffee.
I have no idea what it is about. It is a theater play by Eric Bogosian, who is a known performer with a distinctive style, his one man shows are a blend of dark comedy, geopolitical commentary and social realism. He generally appears as a series of characters, which makes the experience colorful and believable.
All the monologues have different themes yet i could feel that there was a central subject, yet it was constantly escaping me as i was jumping from one character to another, from one action to another, from one state to another.
One of the ideas i got from the reading was that the world is becoming more and more insensitive and that people are already loosing their humanity. "People are the only ones who make [meat]balls out of other animals." Another idea is that people are trying to make so much money that they forget to enjoy them. Money has become the #1 priority and that we seem to forget about what is really important in this life. Like making coffee with your family. And actually smelling it.

"The paradox of life is... paradoxical. In order to breathe in, we must first breathe out. In order to grasp we must first let go. In order for the sun to rise, it must first set. In order to take what i have to give you, you must first give me 2 thousand dollars in four easy installments. Life surrounds us with bounty. An overfloweing cornucopia of goods and services. Everything is there for our taking. We only have to pay for them."

People need to believe in things. It helps them.
People need rules, it takes responsibility off them. They may not even know why they do the things they do, but that is how they do it. Automatically. It's easier. It is not freedom, but it is easier.
People need to place blame. And they need continuity. They do not change their opinions, they are rigid, they are constant. Because change means work, change means moving. Change means you have to think. And why think when you are happy while others think for you? The manipulated and the manipulators. The leaders and the masses. It has always been this way.
"A plane crashed in the mountains last week. 300 people dead. And all i could do was wonder how many of them were on a diet, how many were trying to stop smoking?"
Live your life. The way you want it. Read a book. Like Wake up and smell the coffee. It makes you think.

Friendship and... not

I have had another attempt as to reflect upon a certain matter that has been very painful and yet at the same time very pleasant in my life up till now.
My grandmother cannot conceive the idea that a girl and a boy can be friends - and when i say friends i do not just mean chit chat whenever you meet, talking about daily stuff and the weather. I am talking about friends that you miss when you do not see them, friends that you want to share everything with, friends that you want to hug and kiss (here, kiss=on the cheek), friends you are worried about when things go wrong, friends you spend tons of time with and it is still not enough. Friends that are close to you when you are sick or sad, friends that do not go away when you ask them to but in reality you want them to stay. Friends that do their best to help, friends that you love. Up till now, all these functions ( and some more, but we will get to that soon enough) have been performed by husbands alone. There were no best girl-friends, there were no chit chat buddies, there was only he + she + the family. And it was it. Right now, people like to get to know each other first, they like to become friends. They get to know each other, they spend time together, they laugh, they dance, they confide in each other. You get free massages and unconditional support. As it is said, friendship is a very good substitute for love- if you think about it, it offers the same benefits as having a boyfriend/husband, + other benefits like no jealousy, no bickering, space and peace, and, most importantly these days - freedom. Of course, there are some minuses, the other functions mentioned above. Is there a fault in my reasoning up till now? Am i actually saying that a boyfriend/ husband is just a friend with whom you have sex?
Here is actually where all the problems in my life had started. The first time i fell in love with a very good guy -friend it ended in sparkles and us not seeing each other for 3 years. The second time i reacted a little bit better, but only a little bit. Me passing from pure friendship to actually being attracted to him in the most direct manner possible was not a good thing for our friendship, but i am glad to say that in the end, we are both adults. We both realise that good friends are not so easy to find and that we should not throw away beautiful memories together and deprive ourselves of the ones to come just because my heart went bunkers. I am still greateful to him that he was so rational and that he was responsible enough to talk to me, he did not avoid the problem and confrunted me with it. If he had simply gone away, i am sure that we would not still be talking at the moment. But no. When he told me that we had to talk, i had no idea that he was gonna talk about how he knows that i am in love with him. He said that he was sorry i was hurting and that he would like to continue being friends, but that he was not sure i could, given the circumstances. And then he gave me time. I knew he was gonna be there when i would be over him. And he was. He still is now, and i am happy about it. Of course, his girlfriend is kinda unconfortable with me and hates it when i touch him, kiss him ( here kiss= on the cheek) or even when i look at him. But she is diplomat enough to know that picking a fight with me will not help, so we pretend to be ok with one another. Coz i am not that confortable with her either. That is one of the biggest problems with the girlfriends of my guy-friends. I do not get along with their girls. Is it because i am sooo concerned about their happiness that nothing they do is good enough? Is it because they are different when they are with them, and it seems to me that most of the times this "different" is worse ? Or is it because i am jealous of them? It is true that nothing will ever be good enough for my friends. Coz i love them so much. And it is just that. Affection. Too bad that it does not always stay at that. Sometimes the hormones start playing and out of the blue, you find yourself checking out the behind of... a very good friend. And then when you kiss(=on the cheek) it is sooo close to the lips. And you wonder. Where is the limit? Can 2 friends be attracted to one another? Yes they can. Should they do something about it? Yes they should. Coz one of the parties is automatically frustrated, so things are kinda messy already. But it's hard to pass from just friends to something more. The last time it took a LOT of beer.

Alegeri

Citeam mult cind eram copil. Eram micutsa de statura, si la biblioteca din scoala ajungeam numa la primele 3 rafturi. La un moment dat, citisem toate cartile de acolo. Deci era momentul sa cresc.
Mi-a ramas in memorie fraza atit de des folosita in povesti : "peste mari si tsari". Departarea. Acuma insa nu se simte aceasta departare, pentru ca exista acea minune numita de noi INTERNET. Si dispare si distantsa, si trece si timpul. Cu totsii suntem victime ale acestui fenomen de globalizare. Si odata cu el, dispar si limitele, nu doar hotarele. Avem foarte multa libertate. Mai ales libertate de alegere. Am urmarit pe TED.com un interviu despre aceasta libertate excesiva. Pina acum, cind nu aveam de unde alege, gradul de satisfactsie era mult mai ridicat. Pentru ca de exemplu, exista doar un tip de blugi. Albastri. Cei care nu stateau asa cum vrei tu, insa erau comozi si ii purtai, caci nu era altceva. Acum insa, sunt feluri peste feluri, modele peste modele, culori peste culori. Lasind deoparte timpul pe care il petrecem alegind, deja cind alegi o pereche care tsi se potriveste, o cumperi, insa de cele mai multe ori, iti ramine un sentiment ca poate ai fi putut sa gasesti ceva mai bun daca mai cautai. Deja cind ceva nu iti convine, intreaga responsabilitate este pe tine, caci tu nu ai facut alegerea corecta. Pina acum era simplu. Nu aveai de unde alege. Nu iti place? Rabda. Caci asta e. Altfel nu poate fi.
Nu este insa chiar atit de simplu. Totul incepe de la a-ti alege blugii. Daca sa facem o mica trimitere la blogul unui prieten unde se face alta trimitere la alt articol, trecem de la blugi la partener de viatsa. Acum poti alege. Si nu doar o data. Cindva, se faceau compromisuri si nu divortsa lumea asa cu una cu doua. Acum insa poti alege. Acum, din cauza ca ai atita alegere, ramii ca magarul care avea un vas de orz si unul de mei, si nestiind pe care sa il aleaga, a murit de foame.
Acelasi lucru si cu tsara. Globalizarea asta te impinge si la aceasta alegere. Am stat acum mai mult la vorba cu sora mea, si ea m-a intrebat in care tsara imi vad viitorul. Greu de spus. Caci am de unde alege.
Nu alegi doar familia in care te nasti. Adica asa ar fi normal, sa o acceptsi si sa o iubesti asa cum este. Insa nu este mereu asa. Se destrama famiile, se reneaga feciori si se dezmostenesc fiice. Daca nu iti convine, pleci. Caci poti sa o faci.
Prea multe posibilitatsi. Prea multa alegere. Prea mult de toate.

What makes boys different from girls?

Yesterday was a day in which i hardly stepped more than 50 m from my room. Yet, the diversity of the interactions with different persons made me silently asses the differences between a certain A and B, between X and Y, and therefore, of course, i started wondering about the difference between XX/XY.




Biologically

Humans have 23 pairs of chromosomes within each cell; 22 of these are alike in both males and females. But, "...when we come to the 23d pair, the sexes are not the same. . . every woman has in her cells two of what we call the X chromosome. But a man has just one X---its mate being the much smaller Y." Sex differentiation takes place immediately as the male or female begins to develop within the womb. The sex hormones --primarily estrogen and testosterone--have a significant impact on the behavior of males and females. The neuro-endocrinological evidence is clear: The high level of testosterone in males drives them toward dominance in the world, while the lack of high levels of this hormone in women creates a natural, biological push in the direction of less dominant and more nurturing roles in society.
It is also argued that there are significant brain differences, that one gender has one side more developed than the other, more specifically, it is said that men have the tendency to use the right side of the brain while women, the right side. All the verbal, sorting, detail-oriented side of the brain is the left one, while the spatial intuitive nonverbal side is the right. And yes, research shows that a woman speaks twice as many words as the man has done even before the age of 2.
Also, women seem to have an enhanced awareness of "emotionally relevant details, visual cues, verbal nuances, and hidden meanings. Similarly, while male infants are more interested in objects than in people, female infants respond more readily to the human voice than do male infants. But the difference between the male and female brain is not evidence of superiority or inferiority, but of specialization. One opinion states that men and women are like the right and left leg- different, but neither better than the other. And most importantly, you need both in order to move forward.

Psychologically

Among all the theories that emphasize the differences there are some that promote the similarity among the genders. Also, Alice Eagly's gender role theory claims that boys and girls learn the appropriate behavior and attitudes from the family and overall culture they grow up with, and so non-physical gender differences are a product of socialization. In conclusion, one can say that commonality across cultures and species implies some biological basis, but the fact that the situation is changing reflects the power of socialisation. [...]

The usual stereotypes are the following :
- Men are more prone to taking risks;
- 60-75% of women prefer feeling and 55-80% of men prefer thinking;
- Males are generally more aggressive than females;
- Women are more emotionally expressive and responsive;
- Women express their feelings without constraint, except for the emotion of anger;
- Women score higher in Agreeableness - tendency to be compassionate and cooperative Neuroticism tendency to feel anxiety, anger, and depression and Empathy - capacity to recognise or understand another's state of mind or emotion;
- Women pay more attention to body language and nonverbal communication;
- Women laugh, gaze and smile more;
- Women anticipate negative consequences for expressing anger and aggression;
- Men are overwhelmed by women's expressions of emotion.
- Men control their feelings and restrain from expressing them;
- Men are stoic.
- Men show emotion to communicate dominance.

Differences in communication styles:
- Men tend to talk more than women in public situations, but women tend to talk more than men at home.
- Females are more inclined to face each other and make eye contact when talking, while males are more likely to look away from each other.
- Girls and women tend to jump from topic to topic, but boys and men tend to talk at length about one topic.
- When listening, women make more noises such as “mm-hmm” and “uh-huh”, while men are more likely to listen silently.
- Women are inclined to express agreement and support, while men are more inclined to debate.

These and many others are present in "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" - the book by John Gray that concentrates more on the psychological aspects and on the conflict solving strategies between the sexes. An example of the theories it offers is that women complain about problems because they want their problems to be acknowledged, while men complain about problems because they are asking for solutions. But it emphasizes the fact that the "Martians" and the "Venusians" are just stereotypes and cannot be applied blindly to any individual, as every person is unique in his or her own way. It was a best seller as it offered answers to a lot of questions, but it also raised a lot of critique, as it would have been normal, given the fact that the theme is very controversial. Especially as the femminist communities argued that the book was sexist and that it prioritized the needs of men over the ones of women. The book almost assesses the correctness of the praze mostly used by husbands in marital fights with their wives, " you are like from another planet !!!"

Conclusion

These days stereotypes are harder and harder to sustain - one that definitely seems to have disappeared over the last two decades is that girls have less motivation to achieve. Even the clothing model has changed with the appearance of the unisex pieces. The world is working towards equality of the genders and people fight for equal rights, especially education. Some scientists even asses the possibility of sex differences disappearing by the middle of the next century. Also, all the studies that have been conducted cannot be considered accurate as all are based on averages. As one very intelligent person once said, there are 3 kinds of lies: lies, dammed lies and statistics.

La vita e bella

Italian Movie Week continues as i have decided to fill my evenings with a mixture of The Useful and The Pleasant - useful as i get to practice my listening and comprehension in Italian and i become a little bit more informed when it comes to Italian culture so i would no longer hear comments like "You would't understand, it is typically ITALIAN". It is also pleasant as i get to lay around in my bed and squeeze all the fluffiness out of Hugo Bob.
Roberto Benigni is one of the best known Italian actors, in Italia and abroad. But still he does not have the same recognition as Mel Gibson, Brad Pitt, George Clooney, or, my personal favorite, Jude Law. -->
And it is only because he is not as good looking as the ones i have mentioned above. No, he is the typical Italian - curly, not too tall, skinny and light skinned. But his talent... let's just say that i am a fan.
"La vita e bella" - "Life is beautiful"- had a lot of surprises. Shame on me, i have heard so many good things about the movie, yet i never tried to find out more about the plot and the actors. So yes, i had no idea what the movie was about, but at least now i can say that i watched the original version and i can insist that a lot of things get lost in translation so that is why i had postponed watching it.
The first thing that struck me was the typically Italian settings. No wonder, the action takes place in Tuscany. The narrow streets, steep landscape and lack of trees, original renaissance architecture, small shops, wide squares, horrible parking and small romantic cafeterias with many tables for 2.
The movie is very light and easy to watch, even if one has to keep his eyes on the subtitles.
The humor, the energy, the joyfulness, the will of life and the perspicacity of the main character make him conquer the heart of his "Princess", as he calls her throughout the whole movie. Also, his imagination, his incredible strength and optimism makes him overcome the difficulties that come his way, thus the movie's title "Life is beautiful" does not reflect the positive aspects of life itself, but the fact that one's life is as he wants it to be, as he wants to see it. One may choose to wear pink glasses and that does not interfere with being responsible, ambitious and successful. One can go through life being an optimist, and thus enjoy every second of sun and rain, never give up hope and overcome disappointments by smiling and thinking ahead, wishing for better times that will surely not hesitate to arrive. Even if the attitude of the main character can be seen somewhat as an avoidance of reality and deep denial - only in one scene of the movie was it clear that Guido realized the true proportion of the happenings around him - i think that a positive view towards the things might not change any of them, but they sure make one more capable of thinking clearly as optimists always sleep better.
It is a tragicomedy - but i remained with a pleasant feeling. We all know that in life, when one cannot change the things around him, he must change his attitude. We all know that if we cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel, we are looking the wrong way. We also know that a smile is more powerful than 1000 frowns - yet so few of us practice this sport regularly. Why is that?

Din... principiu ?

Orele 10:00.
Experimentul culinar de azi dimineatsa a constituit omleta cu crabi si cascaval. Suna bine? Pai... nu. Esec total. Cit de greu este insa sa faci omleta??? Poate e din cauza uleiului, poate a ingredientelor, poate mina gospodinei. Am lasat insa deoparte egoul de Martha Stewart ranit si am mincat toata masa semi-omogena - asa, din principiu.
Noi facem ( sau nu facem) multe lucruri " din principiu". Acest concept a devenit deja o expresie, o parte indispensabila a vocabularului, caci rareori este vorba de un principiu adevarat. De exemplu omleta mea, este chiar un principiu sa maninc tot ce iese din bucataria mea? Sa nu accept infringerea si sa pretind ca este victorie chiar si atunci cind in mod evident, nu este? Nu. Este o metoda de autoaparare pe care am adoptat-o contra poluarii emise de realitatea in care traim. La fel am si multe alte instrumente de protectsie. Ca de exemplu sa nu las pe nimeni sa vada ce se intimpla cu adevarat in interiorul meu, caci, "din principiu", nu ma las prada sentimentelor si nici nu sunt spontana. Tot " din principiu", nu ripostez la atacuri, caci o batalie in care cele 2 partsi in realitate lupta contra sine este pierduta din start, sau in cel mai bun caz, se termina cu remiza. In realitate insa, este mai ushor sa te lashi batuta, fie ca e din principiu, din frica, din neputintsa sau din indiferentsa.

PRINCÍPI//U ~i n. 1) Teză fundamentală; idee de bază. 2) Cauză primară. 3) Punct de vedere propriu; convingere personală. ♢ Din ~ conform convingerii.

Principiile de drept sunt reguli de maxima generalitate care sintetizeaza experienta sociala si asigura echilibrul dintre respectarea drepturilor si îndeplinirea obligatiilor.
Etimologic, notiunea de principiu vine de la latinescul PRINCIPIUM care are sensul de început, obârsie sau element fundamental.Orice principiu este un început pe plan ideatic, o sursa de actiune.
Un principiu se poate prezenta sub diverse forme: axiome, deductii sau o generalizare a unor fapte concrete.

Fiindca ma gasesc intr-o groapa inspiratsionala, sau din cauza ca este o ora mult prea matinala pentru astfel de idei, sau fiindca omleta de mai sus nu mi-a picat foarte bine la stomac, reflectsiile mele asupra acestui subiect nu sunt coerente. Deci, folosind cel mai utilizat ( 76 %) motor de cautare am dat peste alte reflectsii asupra acetui subiect, si anume pe opinii.md, sau in alte bloguri, unde insa tema este privita din total alt punct de vedere. Am dat si peste alte articole interesante, ca de exemplu " invatsatsi sa copiatsi"si twisted logic .... si deci aici oficial m-am abatut de la tema.
Asa si nu mi-am gasit raspuns la intrebari. Stiu deja ce este un principiu ( vezi definitsia de mai sus), stiu care sunt principiile mele ( nu, nu am principiul ca trebuie sa ma las de principii, chiar am vreo 2 principii de care ma tsin voluntar-involuntar) insa la moment ma deranjeaza anume acele lucruri pe care le fac / nu le fac cica din principiu, cind in realitate am alte motive. Si deci iata, de la principii am ajuns iarashi la fenomenul de negare a realitatsii - nu ma mai intreb de ce nu A ci B, nu o fac din principiu. Punct.
Si din principiu, azi am 2 posturi.

Slight misandry

1968. Patty Pravo. Don't ask. Listen. It does strike a little bit close to home, but i think that every estrogen secreting human being has experienced this kind of emotion at least once in her life... Why at least once? Because those who have been through it once make sure they never find themselves in the same situation again. But still, there are some specimens that still don't know that men aren't supposed to be loved. They must be accepted. I will not specify what characteristix have made me write this post. I will just say that men and women use different parts of the brain, it has been scientifically proven. So yes, men are from mars and women are from venus. So choose the least worst martian from a bunch of bad, and then live with it... oh, i'm sorry, i meant to say "live with him". And most importantly, keep your distance and your calm where everyone can see it. Do not even think of getting involved. Do not even think of affection. And if you do start to feel the butterflies, make sure he does not know it, coz it might go to his head.

Tu mi fai girar, tu mi fai girar - You spin me around, you spin me around
come fossi una bambola - as if I were a doll
e poi mi butti giu', poi mi butti giu' - then you toss me away
come fossi una bambola - like a doll
Non ti accorgi quando piango - You don't realize when I'm crying
quando sono triste e stanca, tu - when I'm sad and tired
pensi solo per te. - you only think of you
No ragazzo no, No ragazzo no, - No boy
del mio amore non ridere - don't laugh at my love
non ci gioco piu' - I don't play with it any more
quando giochi tu - when you play
sai far male da piangere - you can hurt till I cry
Da stasera la mia vita - From tonight my life
nele mani di un ragazzo, no - in the hands of a boy
non la mettero' piu' - I won't place it any more
No ragazzo no, - No boy
tu non mi metterai - you won't put me
tra le dieci bambole - among the ten dolls
che non ti piacciono piu' - that you don't like any more
Oh no, oh no..no ragazzo no.

P.S. Misandry - hatred of men. But do not worry, it will pass, it is just a phaze.

Intrebari fara raspuns

Astazi este o zi cu soare care a inceput destul de ciudat date fiind evenimentele de ieri seara. Pina la urma nu s-a intimplat nimic, insa toate cele ce au avut in interiorul meu m-au cam dat peste cap - nici pina acum nu stiu cum ma simt in legatura cu toate astea. Stiu doar ca nu ar trebui sa ma afecteze in asemenea hal, insa, ma afecteaza. Asta e. Pot eu face oare ceva?Nu. Deci evit aceste ginduri si ma stradui sa ma bucur de soarele mult asteptat si de somnul bine meritat.

Da, ieri imi puneam intrebari.
Cum se face ca unele persoane itsi ramin prieteni si itsi ramin dragi chiar si daca nu le-ai vazut de 3 ani? Ce este aceasta afectsiune pe care o simtsim fatsa de prietenii nostri, fie ei departe, fie ei straini deja, fie ei diferitsi ?
Cum se face ca ne maturizam atit de repede, sau atit de incet? Cum e posibil sa fii atit de iresponsabil si atit de matur in acelashi timp? Cum se face ca nu vezi decit atunci cind este prea tirziu gravitatea greshelii comise?
Cum se face ca parerea ta despre tine rareori reflecta realitatea? Te ajuta oare arogantsa in viatsa, este oare o metoda de a te proteja de vorbele rele si de frustrarea unei erori?
Cum se face ca ambitsia este deja cea mai mare calitate, iar omenia s-a coborit in clasament cu vreo 1o pozitsii? Cum se face ca nu se mai apreciaza bunatatea si sinceritatea, iar naivitatea este considerata nestiintsa, deci slabiciune?
Cum se face ca este normal sa mintsi si sa insheli?
Cum se face ca invidia deja este inevitabila si nu ai unde te ascunde de ea?
Cum se face ca la fiecare colts apar tentatsii si deci este o lupta continua de a le rezista?
Cum se face ca in viatsa deja nu mai conteaza armele pe care le folosesti, ci cistigul?
Cum se face ca jumatate din viatsa o petrecem asteptind?Asteptind sa ploua, asteptind sa fie soare, asteptind sa fie liniste, asteptind sa fie zgomot, asteptind singuratatea, asteptind un semn de viatsa?
Cum se face ca acele mici bucurii ale vietsii sunt pina la urma sunt cele ce ne fac sa incheiem ziua cu un zimbet? Cum se face ca ne dam seama atit de tirziu ca oricit de mult nu am cauta fericirea, fericirea este in noi?

Time, purpose and limits

After midnight discussions and never ending polemics of what is really going on in our lives, i remained with a few quite disturbing questions. But, in my opinion, asking questions is the first move towards progress, because when we ask questions we are like inquiring children - we only learn if we want to, if we ask and, of course, if we ask the right things.
Yesterday i was asked "What am i doing?". As simple as that, it turned out not to be that simple. I took it literally, so i tried tracing back my steps from during the day.... My first conclusion was that i was spending way too much time in front of the computer. The second was that my biggest fear of becoming antisocial and being alone makes me get out and seek affection wherever there is the slightest sign i could get a bit of the so desired elixir. But most of all, what freaked me out the most, was that while trying to remember what i had done during the day, i was missing a few hours. Where had they gone, and what had i done with them that brings utility to me or to the society? I mean except the effect on global warming derived from my 18hrs use of the computer and the carbon dioxide that i produce with no special awareness, so that are hardly merits. So, what am i doing?
Yesterday i had finished my assignments and went to bed, but i could not sleep. And i cannot say that i was thinking about what i should do with my life. No, i was day-dreaming. Pleasant, but useless. So now i wonder, what is it that i live for? Am i doing anything today in order to be where i want tomorrow? Or better yet, do i know where i want to be tomorrow?
The answer is yes, i do know. I cannot put it into words, but i do know. And yes, more or less i am doing something. Something, but which is a too small percentage of the whole. Theoretically, i know what i should be doing. But, as the microeconomix book so wisely says, there are two cardinal sins from which all others spring: impatience and laziness. Whenever i do not suffer from the latter, the former comes in. And so on. Of course, the book also says, among theories of diminishing returns to scale, that there is more than one way to skin a cat and that it is a crazy world and anything can happen. Also true, especially when you consider the fact that i am not as conventional as my parents would have liked me to be, i have not inherited the conservative views that i have been subject to for so long in the household and i have always tried to break one or another rule just not because i wanted to, but because i could and because it was fun. Of course, i was considered a child with reasonable behavior, but that was because my parents still do no know all that i used to endow my time with.
This morning i watched Living a life of purpose while drinking my now usual coffee ( yes, i am little by little becoming Italian, maybe who knows, in a few years i will become curly, grow a beard and smile widely and hypocritically) and what i have derived from the talk was that yes, we do all have a purpose just like there is an answer to every question. The difficult part is finding it.

Male+female= ?

Can they just be friends?
Male and female, is there pure friendship and no attraction involved, from neither side?
My male friends are great. And i thank them for being there. I love u , guys !

Time and its effects

Due to the endless kindness of a very good friend of mine, i receive on a daily basis links that normally increase the awareness of my ignorance and add to the amount of my knowledge.

Today's link asked the question What to do with spare time?

It got me thinking as these days i have tried to implement a time management technique, but yes, the more time i have the less things i manage to do. But by eliminating the useless routines one can easily spare 2-4 hours a day, fact that is great, but... what to do with the spare time?
The conclusion of the article is learn. Open the book so you can read what other people have thought. And maybe in time you will be fit to write your own.
Learn - man never stops learning. Theoretically, of course. Among students, few are those that are conscious of their mission as a student, few are up to date with the news and what is going on in real time. Because reality is rarely fun... The thing is, no one reads no more. Fact that is alarming. Children spend their time in front of the computer and the TV - and due to the child protection and children rights and so on, even the smallest amount of punishment tends to be cataloged as violence... Which is not true, as children need discipline, they do need a spanking every now and then. I cannot remember being spanked - not because i was docile, but because we had a different system of punishment. I do not believe in violence, but i think that the child must know that the parent makes all the decisions - but nowadays, there is so much independence and the youth is so rotten spoilt.... I enter my once modest lyceum where people wore uniforms and concentrated on study and find that today, it is a fashion show. Video games, MTV, internet and movies are discussed, no more classic authors, no more poems, no more nothing. To be smart and know things means that you will get a certain amount of attention during tests. The rest of the time you will be called " nerd". To be smart is not cool anymore.
From an early age, girls dress provocatively and fashionably. They go out for coffee and chit chat on benches. Nobody plays dolls anymore, all the toys are automated and creativeness and imagination are not encouraged. Everything is served on a silver platter - the robots move and talk, the dolls cry and the animals make the appropriate sounds. There are doll houses, so there is no need to build one. There are movies - so there is no need to play mom and dad. I remember we did not have sophisticated toys. We used to make belief and imagined scenarios. We made clothes for dolls out of socks and old cloth. We used to draw. We used to run, jump and climb trees. Today children are afraid. Today, parents are so overprotective of their offspring that the latter grows up full of fears, indecisive and irresponsible. And yes, i think that all the bruises and all the messes i got myself into as a child helped me become the person i am now.
Innocence has somewhat become obsolete. Everyone knows at a very early age where children come from, and each generationthe shock is less and less powerful. I remember when i found out that there was no cabbage garden and no stork, i felt i had been lied to all my life. But i did not judge my parents for that, as sex at that time was a disgusting concept, so i did not blame them for trying to keep it a secret. These days children play the bottle at very early ages, and start french kissing before the age of 10. I personally find it disturbing, because the children of today are the society of tomorrow. Children barely see their parents, fact that also contributes to the general issue of mis-educated youth. These days, material values have started to be more important, so mothers work in order to assure a bright future for the child that ends up educated by a middle-class, middle-knowledge nanny. Anomalies increse, psichological disease is everywhere we look.
I am not sure i want my child to grow in this world. As i said today, society is going bunkers. Things that were unpercievable before are normal today, good and bad. But i personally think that the bad is worse that the goodness of good. Technology? Progress? Maybe. But at what cost?

Emo

For all the emo's out there, this is for you !




Question : Why did the Emo cross the street?
Answer: You wouldn't understand... "




P.S. Thanx A !