Friendship and... not

I have had another attempt as to reflect upon a certain matter that has been very painful and yet at the same time very pleasant in my life up till now.
My grandmother cannot conceive the idea that a girl and a boy can be friends - and when i say friends i do not just mean chit chat whenever you meet, talking about daily stuff and the weather. I am talking about friends that you miss when you do not see them, friends that you want to share everything with, friends that you want to hug and kiss (here, kiss=on the cheek), friends you are worried about when things go wrong, friends you spend tons of time with and it is still not enough. Friends that are close to you when you are sick or sad, friends that do not go away when you ask them to but in reality you want them to stay. Friends that do their best to help, friends that you love. Up till now, all these functions ( and some more, but we will get to that soon enough) have been performed by husbands alone. There were no best girl-friends, there were no chit chat buddies, there was only he + she + the family. And it was it. Right now, people like to get to know each other first, they like to become friends. They get to know each other, they spend time together, they laugh, they dance, they confide in each other. You get free massages and unconditional support. As it is said, friendship is a very good substitute for love- if you think about it, it offers the same benefits as having a boyfriend/husband, + other benefits like no jealousy, no bickering, space and peace, and, most importantly these days - freedom. Of course, there are some minuses, the other functions mentioned above. Is there a fault in my reasoning up till now? Am i actually saying that a boyfriend/ husband is just a friend with whom you have sex?
Here is actually where all the problems in my life had started. The first time i fell in love with a very good guy -friend it ended in sparkles and us not seeing each other for 3 years. The second time i reacted a little bit better, but only a little bit. Me passing from pure friendship to actually being attracted to him in the most direct manner possible was not a good thing for our friendship, but i am glad to say that in the end, we are both adults. We both realise that good friends are not so easy to find and that we should not throw away beautiful memories together and deprive ourselves of the ones to come just because my heart went bunkers. I am still greateful to him that he was so rational and that he was responsible enough to talk to me, he did not avoid the problem and confrunted me with it. If he had simply gone away, i am sure that we would not still be talking at the moment. But no. When he told me that we had to talk, i had no idea that he was gonna talk about how he knows that i am in love with him. He said that he was sorry i was hurting and that he would like to continue being friends, but that he was not sure i could, given the circumstances. And then he gave me time. I knew he was gonna be there when i would be over him. And he was. He still is now, and i am happy about it. Of course, his girlfriend is kinda unconfortable with me and hates it when i touch him, kiss him ( here kiss= on the cheek) or even when i look at him. But she is diplomat enough to know that picking a fight with me will not help, so we pretend to be ok with one another. Coz i am not that confortable with her either. That is one of the biggest problems with the girlfriends of my guy-friends. I do not get along with their girls. Is it because i am sooo concerned about their happiness that nothing they do is good enough? Is it because they are different when they are with them, and it seems to me that most of the times this "different" is worse ? Or is it because i am jealous of them? It is true that nothing will ever be good enough for my friends. Coz i love them so much. And it is just that. Affection. Too bad that it does not always stay at that. Sometimes the hormones start playing and out of the blue, you find yourself checking out the behind of... a very good friend. And then when you kiss(=on the cheek) it is sooo close to the lips. And you wonder. Where is the limit? Can 2 friends be attracted to one another? Yes they can. Should they do something about it? Yes they should. Coz one of the parties is automatically frustrated, so things are kinda messy already. But it's hard to pass from just friends to something more. The last time it took a LOT of beer.