Love is eternal while it lasts

L'Amore è eterno finché dura . The reviews say that it is not good, but not bad. That it lacks color and expression. That the actors lack direction and that they are not believable. I say that it is a review by an American, thus by definition by a person who is not capable to understand the depth of the movie. It does not have any special effects, it does not have the most stunning cast, it does not show exquisite locations and does not present out-of-this-world events. So for the average American, used to empty plot lines and memorable explosions, to beautiful curves and at least one sex scene, this movie seemed boring. Yes, it was simple. Yes, the actors did look lost, but it was because they were in character. And there was a very clear message to the movie that was beautifully sent to the audience - me and Hugo Bob, of course.
It is all about what happens after the typical American movie ends. It is all about after the first date, wedding day, honeymoon, birth of child, appearance of all the possible relatives and discovery of all possible dirty secrets and skeletons from the closet. After all that, when the daughter is grown up and no, she does not have any drug problems. No, he is not George Clooney who ages so nicely.He is the average 50 year old man, with a typical mentality. No, he does not emphasize family values and tends to be attracted by personal freedom. No, he does not sacrifice himself in the name of the vows, and neither for the sake of their child. She is a grown up, she knows things are not working between mom and dad. So why make all of the involved miserable? He finds that at 50 he has the same young soul and only his body has aged, he finds that he has the same dreams and the same illusions, he finds that he can fall in love and he can actually make love as a teenager. And no, he does not make drama scenes, nor does he tolerate them. He'd rather call things by their names. Yes, he still feels affection for his wife, but no, there no longer was a marriage to save.
She is also the typical middle aged woman. Deeply depressed about menopause and into a drastic diet that makes her devour all the ice-cream in the kitchen when left loose. Neglected by her husband, she turns to the so comfortable tennis instructor that is only in it for the fun, and who, of course, dumps her when she is on the verge of divorce. She, at 50, found that in search for happiness and for a better life, she threw away the life that she had, and in the end, she ended up with nothing. She was a marital councellor, and ironically, she overlooked her own problems.
Typical marriage. Routine. When after the attraction is gone, there is nothing to talk about. Sad, but that is how it is. A real estate agent would know best - while selling houses to couples of all ages, the discussions are all bout that extra-room where one could run away from the other. All about the guest room, where no guests are expected. All about the space, all about the mystery that vanishes after 20 years of marriage. That is the solution to the love killing institution called marriage. Space. Time alone. Privacy. The possibility to listen to the kind of music that you love yet your life partner never learnt to accept. The freedom to watch your favourite soap opera... or even the freedom to sleep alone. Why does marriage have to be an obligatory institution with all kinds of restrictive rules? What is the best way to handle it?
What makes a relationship work? And even more, what makes a relationship last? The movie tried to answer the eternal dilemma... So the two people, from two different relationships, got together as both needed the air and the novelty. They decided that there was no need to live together. That there was no need to get married. That perfect is to be with one another when both want it. The rest of the time... one needs space. The rest of the time, one need to think in terms of "I" and not "We". But it does not work that way, does it?